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Issues in family life

Issues in Family Life The perennial issue of balancing work and family life have always affected millions of families around the world. Parents need to prioritize their time and choose from two difficult choices : spend time with children or focus on their career. However, technology has made life more convenient so modern parents must be able to harness resources to keep them in touch with their children through various means of communication. The important factor in spending time with one’s children is the quality of communication that is shared between parent and child.
Another important issue that should be dealt with is handling conflicts especially bonding fights. The first premise is that bonding fights cannot altogether be avoided since family members have conflicting ideas or opinions about certain issues. Nevertheless, its frequency can be lessened by open communication and right tone of voice. Frankly, the impression I have regarding the guidelines on “ Nine Guidelines on Bonding Fights” is that it is possible if family members would agree “ to disagree”. For those who know such guidelines, they can successfully follow the guidelines if they can control themselves first. It is my observation that the guidelines focus is more on self-control and self- initiative in putting an end to angry feelings. When a person is angry, it is easy for that individual to fly off the handle and start becoming personal in accusation and subjective in arguing. As a result, double or mixed messages are communicated which further aggravates the situation.
Therefore, for the nine guidelines to be successfully implemented as a framework for bonding fights, the person must change his attitude and mindset first. Honestly, it takes a lot of maturity to handle the emotions such as anger and sadness.
In the case of family violence, the cause of which varies: control, fidelity, power and ego. If one would summarize the causes it is all about emotions. Family violence is about fear from losing control so one abuses authority to reassert one’s position. A dominant father physically hurts his children since he is insecure and perceives physical coercion as the most probable means of establishing control. Fidelity is a common issue in family violence because powerful emotions such as anger and jealousy can even lead to murder. The much celebrated case of O. J. Simpson shows us how ruthless a husband can be in imposing fidelity to a spouse in a very threatening manner. Obsession can lead to family violence as jealous spouses perform unnatural behavior such as threatening their spouse or even stalking them to feed their obsessions. The feeling of love, when not properly controlled, modified or handled can lead to obsession which is not a healthy form of loving a person. Human development happens when there is respect for freedom or rights even between married couples. Partners are not objects to possess at all ; thus, when an individual is not emotionally stable in a relationship this person can be at risk for violent behavior.
References:
Lamanna, Mary Ann & Riedmann, Agnes.( 2008 )Marriages and Families: Making Choices in a Diverse Society. Cengage Learning.

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